The terrible films drinking game

So here’s a little video I made recently, all about playing drinking games whilst watching terrible films. I don’t know how other people can edit their own videos and not critique the way they sound/look. I really dislike the sound of my own voice, but I guess I’ll just to have to get over it.

Paradoxically, ever since I’ve gone from having lots time to myself to working full time – I have been significantly more productive in my personal projects. Because my spare time has become significantly more precious, I have a desire to get as much done as I can.

I’m hoping to share more projects soon and hopefully start blogging/vlogging weekly.

The Fear: An Update

100dayproject

6 Days of my 100 Days Working in Public project

Since my last personal blog post back in February, I can say with certainty that I feel better about my creative wellbeing. I’ve started on a few projects, which I won’t reveal just yet, that have really fed my motivation. The 100 Day Project I started last month I had to put on hold, since I didn’t have the time to get out and work in public, but I’ll be restarting it tomorrow. (So… I no longer have time to go out to places, since I’ve started a full time job, instead I will be thinking of other creative projects to do in its place). For the rest of the things that improved my outlook and motivation, here is a list:

For the most part, having just a few personal goals has really helped. I used to have so many aspirations that I didn’t know where to start, but breaking them all down and cutthroat with my plans has helped me focus on the things I really want to achieve.

The Fear

I am very secretive when it comes to sharing my feelings online, but I want to start being honest about some things. So here is my big secret, I am afraid to create. I don’t know when I started to feel this immense pressure, but most likely it coincided with me becoming more self aware.

I have always drawn and for so long I feel like it has been the greatest part of my persona, “The Artist”. I never really excelled academically, I was always poor to average. But being artistic was one of the rare things I was good at, so it naturally felt like something I’d follow into working life. But a combination of comparing myself to others (with their amazing work), worrying about what people would think of my work and the expectation that I need to be able to live off my craft has dulled my desire to produce pretty much anything. The only times that I’ve felt free to be creative is when I write in my diary, because I didn’t care about how it reads.

But I want to get out of this creative slump. I want to find my voice and produce work that I can confidently say is mine. I want to be able to sit down and work on a project and immerse myself in the process. And in order to do that I have to get over the idea that everything has to be perfect all the time.

A good example me letting go of the idea of being perfect, was uploading my first attempt at vlogging. Vlogging for the first time really intimidated me. I am incredibly self critical about all aspects of myself. But at the same time there’s a freeing element to it, to letting go and just showing what I’ve made – despite my reservations about it. I definitely think I should and could do better, but that’s all part of the creative process – of never fully being happy with your work but still striving to improve it.

So for the month of February I intend to experiment with different ways to unleash my creativity. I have already started two projects today. They are the Infomagical project (it’s five days of experiments to help you regain your focus) and The 100 Days Project. For The 100 Days Project I intend to do something pretty basic and straight forward, but its something that will really help me with my concentration. I will spend my 100 Days Working In Public. Just getting out the house and finding somewhere outside of my incredibly distracting home environment to work in. So I guess February is all about focus and concentration.

You can follow both my twitter and instagram is you’re interested in how I get on. I will also be doing a blog update at the end of each project.